happy? valentine's day...

I don't think I can do it. I love to sing. It is my favorite thing in the world. So why do I always feel like it is being taken away from me? I got a part that requires absolutely minimal singing. I can't achieve that stylized mature sound that classical training requires. I don't understand why I must continuously have "potential" and then never actually achieve anything. At the end of my senior year in high school my choir teacher called me a "diamond in the rough". And although I love the idea of being compared to someone like Aladdin, I can't help but wonder when will I just be the "diamond"? I work very hard so it can't be my lack of effort. I am constantly pushing forward but then someone has to say one tiny remark about how I am trying to make my aria sound like a pop song and I crumble. This is so stupid. And later tonight, I am required to play a comic relief character without relying on the fact that at least people can say I sang well if my acting sucks. I am scared for my life. And the sad thing is today is Valentine's Day and I have no one to share my fears with (friend or otherwise). People never understand. I guess I don't even understand...